my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
Randomize
