i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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