No, you can still breathe under the balls.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
