Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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