But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Randomize