C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
