I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Randomize