i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
Randomize
