oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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