even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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