So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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