Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
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