I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I accidentally asked my mom for a blowjob because 'mom' and 'molly' are next to each other in my address book.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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