He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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