she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
