ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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