I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
our cab driver is having phone sex.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
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