her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
