I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
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