found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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