Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize
