I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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