so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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