your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
Randomize
