Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
