well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize
