so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
