Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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