You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
