I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
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