its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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