who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
pro-tip: weed infused snickerdoodles are far less conspicuous to eat at work than brownies. no one ever suspects the snickerdoodle.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
