My pussy is not your playground.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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