mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Pretty sure keeping my vibrator in the same drawer with the weed makes it work better. I fall asleep almost immedi
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
