watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
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