If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize
