I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Randomize
