Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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