This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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