I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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