idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
