even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Randomize
