I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Randomize
