hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Randomize
