this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
