What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Randomize
