Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
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