Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
