i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
