I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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