I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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